Wednesday, April 25, 2007

“You have to trust your [urine soaked] hands.”

Moises Alou attributes his recent success at the plate to trusting his hands. And, Mr. Alou, is there anything unusual that you do, regarding these hands of yours? Funny you should ask… In a 2004 conversation with an ESPN reporter, Moises Alou attributed his success in hitting without batting gloves to “urine therapy” or more bluntly, pissing on his hands, which he claims makes them harder, while preventing calluses.

After some internet research it turns out that, as a skin treatment, urine therapy is not entirely deranged. Urine contains urea, which is found (in synthetic form, they claim) in many skin creams. The thing, though, is that urea is supposed to soften the skin, rather than make it harder.

When Alou signed with the Mets, I was saddened and skeptical. Saddened, because his signing meant the end of Cliff Floyd, and skeptical, because, after the addition of Shawn Green, I felt that the team was set for aging out-fielders who hit a lot of homers in the late ‘90s. But Moises Alou is one hard-ass dude: he has been hitting over .300 and recovering from potentially career ending injuries for almost as long as some of the younger Mets have been alive; when asked if, like Julio Franco (who is 48 and lives on egg-whites), he had a special diet, he said he drank light beer; during the cold weather, when all the other Mets were wearing those cowls and looking like shivering ninjas, Alou was just hanging out in left field in shirt-sleeves.

So, while your urine, or my urine, might make skin softer, Moises Alou’s provides that perfect degree of callous-less hardness- ‘cause that’s just how tough he is.

Last night’s game, the season’s first foray into extra innings, was won on hits by bench players Damion Easley and Endy Chavez. Which begs the question, since none of the starters were hitting, why weren’t they brought in sooner? Also: GOD DAMMIT TO HELL, NEW YORK METS, WON’T YOU STOP STRANDING RUNNERS ON BASE? Although, if the next time Reyes goes 0-5, they still manage to win 2-1 after twelve innings, I’ll take it.

88 comments:

Wystan Bottomly said...

Any man who subsists on a steady diet of beer will quite naturally discharge enough bodily fluid with which to wash his hands (and god knows what else) on a very regular basis. Which doesn't explain why Mr Alou's hands are hard rather than soft, unless of course the fluid in question is transferred to the bat, in which case the bat would become soft, and that would presumably be counterproductive.

I never expected a Mets blog to be so interesting.

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The general complexities of men's and women's style

Both women and men can feel the pressures of keeping their wardrobe up-to-date and in time, yet men's fashion usually seems a lot less complicated. Of program, for both sexes, costumes and fashion choices could be quite as elaborate, and there are numerous'modern'items that can easily become fashion faux pas - who will say they often see people walking on in 70s flames? On the other side, men's fashion features a few choice items which can exist eternally - which man is likely to watch out of position with a good-quality, tailored suit, for example? Choose basic pieces, colours and fabrics and you'll never seem out-of-place.

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