Roger Clemens Facts:

“Brother Soldiers, should not a half-pay officer roger for sixpence?”
-James Boswell’s London Journal, 1762-63

-As of now Clemens is 8th on the all-time wins list, behind Kid Nichols.

-Clemens once pitched inside to his own son.

-Clemens was the starter for Boston, in the infamous “Billy Buckner-error” Game 6 of the 1986 World Series. All season long he had followed a ritual of not shaving on days he pitched. After probably taking himself out of the game with a blister, after 7 innings, holding onto a 3-2 lead, he shaved to look good for the cameras at the Red Sox victory press conference…chump.

-Clemens has been mentioned as a juicer by both Jose Conseco and Jason Grimelsy, and seems to pitch as well as well in his 40s as he did in his 20s but BARYY BONDS IS DESTROYING BASEBALL! BARY BONDS! HOME RUN RECORD!

-Roger Clemens is white.

-Although Clemens was notorious as a “head-hunter” for most of his career in the American League, he only hit nine batters over two years while pitching for the Astros in the National League, where he would have been subject to retribution.

-If you take into account the 18th century usage, every time you say Roger Clemens’ full name, you also express my exact feelings about him.